How to stop caring what other people think and be true to yourself [+ 5 POWERFUL tips to help you develop self-confidence]
No matter who you are, I think it’s safe to say that at some point in your life you’ve spent too much energy worrying about what other people think – what they think of your appearance, your job, your art, your goals and plans, the food you order, the music you listen to… It’s EXHAUSTING! And no matter how much you tell yourself that you don’t care, it’s hard NOT to care… And the weight of other people’s opinions can become PARALYZING.
Something needs to change! It’s time to stop caring what other people think. Think of how much mental freedom that would give you. And it may not be possible (to completely stop worrying about what other people think of you, but it IS possible to stop letting other people’s judgment weigh you down and hold you back.
Giving up the need to please others
“You have no responsibility to live up to what other people think you ought to accomplish. I have no responsibility to be like they expect me to be. It’s their mistake, not my failing.” – Richard P. Feynman
Humans are social creatures and we live in a world where how other people see us matters – it affects how they interact with us and how we interact with them. The problem comes up when we try to squash ourselves into an idea or image that just doesn’t fit who we really are.
The good news is that we don’t have to keep swimming against the drag of other people’s expectations. We can learn to embrace ourselves for who we really are and give up caring what other people think.
It’s pretty hard to know how to live when you’re caught up trying to please other people and trying to live up to other people’s expectations. (Especially in the age of social media, when everything you see is heavily edited and not a realistic standard.)
And when you are constantly comparing yourself to other people – it’s almost impossible not to get weighed down by a barrage of negative self-talk and anxiety.
People will judge you no matter what
“There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing.” – Aristotle
There’s no getting around it: people will judge you, no matter what. You will be judged by your appearance, your success, your weight, your choice of partner, your income, and even your personality.
But just because people are judging you, doesn’t mean you have to let it get to you. How you react to the judgments of others is completely within your control.
Once you give up the need to please others, you will experience a major shift in your life
“Care about people’s approval, and you will always be their prisoner.” – Lao Tzu
One of the most powerful actions you can take to improve your life is to give up the need to please others. Which is really hard, since we all want to be liked and accepted by other people. And many of us have spent our entire lives trying to please others and not rock the boat. But once you stop trying to control everyone else’s reactions to you and give up your desire to make everyone like you, you will experience a major shift in your life.
Be true to yourself
“Nothing can be more hurtful to your heart than betraying yourself.” – Roy T. Bennett
Being yourself is one of the most important aspects of living a full and satisfying life. If you’re constantly pretending to be someone you aren’t, you’ll never know what you’re truly capable of. To live a full life, you have to be yourself, no matter what anyone else thinks.
This is easier said than done, of course. It’s easy to end up feeling disconnected from yourself when you are constantly being buffeted about by external pressures and playing roles. And it’s hard to live life the way you want when you’re constantly being judged or criticized by others. But if you are going to stay true to yourself, you should never let anyone else’s opinion dictate who you are.
Become comfortable with who you are
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” – Dr. Seuss
It’s easy to feel like you need to be someone different from who you are. There’s always that little voice inside your head saying “what if” and pointing out the ways you could be better and more – and it’s hard to turn that voice off because you’ve listened to it all your life.
It’s hard to stop trying to live up to expectations and be the person you think you’re supposed to be. It’s hard to accept that you’re enough just as you are and that you don’t need to be anyone else.
Being yourself is the BEST thing you can do. You are truly unique and once you are comfortable with who you are, you will be unstoppable.
5 things you can do to build self-confidence
“As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.” – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
1. See yourself the way you want to be seen. A person who is confident in themselves sees themselves through the eyes of abundance and possibility.
2. Write a list of your best qualities. Identify the positive things about yourself that you want to focus on.
3. Stop comparing yourself to others. Focus on becoming the best version of yourself.
4. Practice positive self-talk. Be kind to yourself. Treat yourself as well as you would a good friend.
5. Accept compliments graciously. Don’t brush off compliments or offer excuses. Acknowledge that you are appreciated for your positive qualities.
What have you smothered in yourself out of the fear of what other people might think?
“How can you rise, if you have not burned?” – Fatima Ahmad Ibrahim
Are you ready to commit to your own transformation? Take a deep breath and dive on in ->